Vindicated

I don't like calling attention to myself. If I could simply stay to Myself, and "keep" to myself, I could.
The people that know me best, know this about me.
I only want attention at Halloween when I'm dressed up! 🎃 I can pretend to not be me (the shy, awkward, rock n roll lover, who smiles a lot when she has no idea what to say or do in A LOT of situations). Wait a minute - I
Like those characters, too, so I guess I am myself in costume - ------

So I came to Kelsey with an idea to take "cancer warrior" pictures. I asked her what her ideas would be, and we got super excited about taking our feelings and making a portrait describing my "war path."

I'm equally awkward at taking pictures, but needed an artistic expression. Last night, Kelsey said, "let's do it tonight", and the story began.
I got my "costume Michelle" mode, and I was ready. The odd thing is, as a realized earlier in this blog - I'm actually characters much like me, so I'm actually being myself, just a little more vibrant.
Kelsey took a few pictures of me, we came home, it took a good 30 minutes to wash the pomeade and hairspray from my hair, (oh how I miss and love thee, sweet 80s) to find an incredible amount of likes on the photo we had just taken - within that small amount of time!
Speechless --- once again, not wanting to call attention to myself, just wanting to express myself. But without a word, I allowed you all to feel my soul. The most special part of it all was that my own daughter captured the image that will forever be "The Warrior."

Vindicated.
I love this word, and I love the meaning. It's perfect for this blog, because I was VInDiCAtEd
Somehow, not wanting to "put myself out there", I already had, I already had
Vindicated why I was doing this blog.
For ME. To touch. Someone. By being myself.

And so more
Lyrics ring in my head:
Vindicated, I am selfish, I am wrong, I am right
I swear I'm right, swear I knew it all along
And I am flawed, but I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now the things you swore, you saw yourself

Slight hope dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption
(Dashboard Confessional)